there was 1 mud, 1 mama, 2 munchens, and 1 fat tolook ( what the "fijian", without e ability of the fijian 7s team but with the skin colour and length of limbs to match, in our team calls an Indian-Muslim.) so being the most multi-ethnic table at a certain Thai-Muslim restaurant, we began to examine what it meant to be a fat tolook.whenever i pointed at the tolook and started saying something, fairuz would start to laugh n soon we'll all be cracking up while the tolook happily went about eating his food and our leftovers. important points of contention:
1)whose pisang is it in the prata pisang??? this time is really "lan jiao hor le ka lou ke" because of the exceptional traces of bawang(onion) found in it, we decided it had to be the tolook's
2)so since david can represent korea at a 7s tournament next time, khalrul can too! but for who? we considered bangladesh, on which the mama, pravin remarked they will surely win cleaning competitions; eventually it came to a conclusion that he should represent "tolook land", he can captain it too.
3)pravin with all his literary scholarship made the greatest impact with the line, " so khalrul, to-look or not to-look? that is the question."
what a crappy dinner that was. but it was fun while it lasted.

after watching the 7s, i feel inadequate, i don't feel ready. South Africa, Argentina and the other powers, even Canada, are practically from another planet. even Asian teams like Japan and Korea are. those are the elite of Asia's rugby. i remember playing against the Japanese in the ARFU u19 and getting bulldozed. i have the photos and i look at em everyday. 2 of them i remember very well, the captain, an outside centre with phenomenal pace and a great deal of power. as well as their hooker, Yasutake Nagashita who i read, scored against Australia in the u19 world cup. i want to be just like him in our division but it just doesn't feel right yet. i'm not accustomed to the old school of thought of props being huge and immobile. props can be gigantic, powerful and superbly mobile. but i just can't help but feel that i lack the pace, and muscularity to be able to establish complete physical domination over the entire period of the game, all over the field yet. its really near, time to step up the tempo once again. double the dosage of drugs and intensify the training, by the time of reckoning i've got to be 90kg and all over the field, making everyone realize that to play against Raffles is courting your own complete physical destruction.

i've got to stop trying to msg you, its pointless. everytime i just feel a certain cracking and ache in that place. i've never been any good at this. i should just let it go, i really need to focus on rugby and my academics but its just hopeless cause i just keep repeating the folly, over and over again whenever my mind n heart drifts away to you when the adrenaline wears off. but then why should i deserve a chance? you're just a class above.

I've been watching your world from afar,
I've been trying to be where you are,
And I've been secretly falling apart,
Aqualung - Strange and beautiful




posted by Down the rabbit hole we go. at Saturday, April 03, 2004

life's like that.
ignorance is bliss, tis folly to be wise. - Alexander Pope got that from "Passage to India" literature lesson, and there is a great amount of truth in a broad context. if we never knew about those suffering in poverty, war, famine and other forms of hardship, living in our comfortable world, we would never feel any guilt. but when examined in a microsm, it just does not hold true. to be ignorant will merely lead on to greater pitfalls and only the wise will be able to extricate themselves from the quagmires they have fallen into. i feel like an ignorant child, i haven't had a game in ages and i'm dying to have a go, just to know how good am i now. blah ignorance now is definitely no bliss. gotta know if things will work the way they're suppose to in a game.

i missed the waterpolo match on thursday. arghz. really wanted to watch beebam n diyan n chub wack the living day lights out of the blue n yellow muthafuckers, i just love to see ac sportsmen cry in disappointment or broken in bits and pieces. but they lost 10-9, shrug its alright i guess there's still the finals. gotta be there to watch, i would gladly miss anything but training for it.

posted by Down the rabbit hole we go. at Friday, April 02, 2004

i like the word "blitzkrieg". its German and a rough translation means lightning war. well that's the way battles and wars should be fought and won, at blinding pace, power and precision. if the enemy is caught reeling from the offensive, unable to regroup and counterattack, victory is at hand. break gaps and have ample reinforcements to flood in and exploit the gap.
heavy, mobile, and penetrative armoured formations have to be the apex of the assault, swarming through the gaps that open and racing for the objective. crushing all resistance in its way.

admiral togo, commander in chief of e Imperial Japanese Navy at the battle of the Tsushima Straits during the Russo-Japanese War of 1904-05.

"the gods award the crown to those who, by their training in peacetime, are victorious even before they go into battle."

just on a side note, i like a mohawk hair cut and golden streaks. yeahz that would rock totally.

posted by Down the rabbit hole we go. at Thursday, April 01, 2004

desire and passion for glory will be what seperates us. it is what seperated them today. ri never matched the saints in terms of aggression, intensity, urgency and a physically bruising approach. when you're willing to put everything on the line for it, and standing side by side with you are those who share the same beliefs and are willing and able to make the same sacrifices;fear fades into some obscure corner --- nothing will stand in the way to glory. pain is only part of the mind, common suffering pulls us together and only makes us stronger n closer.

Ka mate, Ka mate!
It is death, It is death
Ka ora, Ka ora!
It is life, It is life

Ka mate, Ka mate!
It is death, It is death
Ka ora, Ka ora!
It is life, It is life

Tenei te tangata puhuruhuru
This is the man above me
Nana i tiki mai whakawhiti te ra!
Who enabled me to live

A hupane, kaupane
As I climb up step by step
A hupane, kaupane whiti te ra!
Towards sunlight
Hi!

Yea though I walk through
the valley of the shadow of
death, I will fear no evil;
for thou art with me; thy rod
and thy staff they comfort me
psalms 23


posted by Down the rabbit hole we go. at Wednesday, March 31, 2004

i fall deeper into this quagmire of underachievement and forlorn feelings, so i just take it out on myself in the gym and on those punishing long runs around the estate. looks like econs is downright in the gutter, confirm fail liao...with mcq score of 8/20. in booker T lingo, i just couldn't dig it. the only saving grace is my european hist. which got 64%, wait till international hist. comes out. and my history will become kingdom come. then there are those other things i don't want to talk about. they bother me but at times i can just shift em out of my mind and banish them. but then when all the adrenaline and the fire takes a backseat, that angelic face just reappears in my mind, but i just ain't good enough. -shrug- its only when i step out there when i feel the real confidence flow in, when i have the ball i know nothing can stand in my way i know i got buddies covering my behind, it all becomes so simple, so drilled. when anything fucks up, we just all pile in and clean up. out here in life, i just keep thinking how you would feel if i did something. e complications of life.

And when she walks, all the wind blows and the angels sing
But, she doesn't notice me



posted by Down the rabbit hole we go. at Monday, March 29, 2004